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Tiger Woods Bores with Another Fantastic Performance

by Albert Bianchi on August 20th, 2006

Tiger Woods won another major. Great. Once again, Tiger pulled away from the field on Sunday, creating another major victory completely devoid of any drama whatsoever. Another dominating performance. Sports writers will search their Thesauruses to find synonyms for great to describe Woods. Some creative souls may even make up their own words. The laziest of the group will use the Ruthian Tigeresque. I was thinking about using super-duper.

Instead, I’m using boring. Everything about Tiger’s robotic quest to own everything in golf’s record book bores me to tears. He has zero competition whatsoever. His dominance is unquestioned and authoritative. What fun is that? His only competition is in the arena of completely tedious dominance in individual sports. Roger Federer has a lot of soulless wins to go to compete with Eldrick and Pete Sampras’ voice immodulation gives him just enough interest to push him over the top. It’s not even interesting in the battle of the disinteresting.

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